What Does It Mean To Be A High Value Man?

What is a high value man? Better yet, what is a high value person?

There is often a lot talk in the red pill community, in regards to being a high value man. Most of the defining terms for it, consists of having more money and being more appealing in the “sexual market place”. While having more money and physical appeal is not a bad thing, that can’t be all there is.

Moreover, and what I have been very passionate about over the last several months, is how do men like myself become more high value? Even within the context that they find themselves in. For instance, it can be very difficult to go out and meet people, so you are on social media a lot, or dating sites. Maybe no matter how man jobs you’ve applied for you can’t seem to land a job.

Worse yet, maybe you feel as though no one would ever find you attractive and want to be with you. That’s a very rough and defeating place to be. I’ve been there myself and sometimes those thoughts still creep up in my life. What I have discovered though and what has helped me fight off that heavy perspective of myself, is having a radical acceptance of myself.

Now, that in no way means just coasting though life, without making improvements on the self. No, a radical self -acceptance simply means that one recognizes that they are loved, valued, worthy of respect and dignity first. Before going your better half in life. It means being at peace with yourself first, and not relying on someone else to provide you peace and try and “fix you” in some way. As you find a radical acceptance in the self, that should then motivate you to go after a higher calling in life, which could be one of many things. It should motivate you to want to improve yourself in every single way humanly possible. Try losing weight, gaining muscle tone, becoming stronger mentally and emotionally. Getting right with God. This is what it means holistically to be a high value man-person. You can all of these things. You just have to be willing to work at it, every single day. No matter how long it takes!

How To Endure Suffering and Embrace All of Life.

 

Life is a series of moments, moments that are quickly escaping us. Whether we are aware of it or not. Which is breath, each month, each year, with every word and with every thought. And what we do in these moments is up to us. What we believe in these moments is up to us.

We can choose to be a pessimist or we can choose to be optimist. Sure, each day brings trials and worries of its own, yet the choice is still ours. Even in the darkest of times, we don’t have to be completely swallowed up by suffering.

Suffering does not have to crush or destroy us. One of the ways I have found to endure the hard times of life, is to condition myself in the midst of suffering. The same way I condition my body in the gym and on the matts. I condition my mind to be strong and stable in the harshest of conditions.

Am I always successful at it? No, I am not. I fail at it a lot, but if I/we do not condition ur minds to endure suffering. Life will in fact crush us. How do I condition my mind, you ask?

two ways:

  1. Patience’s in suffering- this is something we humans do not want to hear, but it is true none the less. Wishing the pain away, really does nothing for us. But being calm and as steady as rock, thus allows us to pray, ask, seek and knock. It allows us to endure and learn optimal lessons about ourselves. Consider the words in James 5:7-8 (NIV)  Be patient, then, brothers and sisters, until the Lord’s coming. See how the farmer waits for the land to yield its valuable crop, patiently waiting for the autumn and spring rains. You too, be patient and stand firm, because the Lord’s coming is near.    When we know that the Lord is near, nothing can shake us. When we truly know his character and his love for us. The suffering and adversity is momentary compared to his steadfast love.

2. Learn the art of Joy: Psalm 30:

 will extol you, O Lord, for you have drawn me up
    and have not let my foes rejoice over me.
Lord my God, I cried to you for help,
    and you have healed me.
Lord, you have brought up my soul from Sheol;
    you restored me to life from among those who go down to the pit.[a]

Sing praises to the Lord, O you his saints,
    and give thanks to his holy name.[b]
For his anger is but for a moment,
    and his favor is for a lifetime.[c]
Weeping may tarry for the night,
    but joy comes with the morning.

 

The poet David knows suffering all too well, and even he has endured much difficulty and despair. And yet he has learned the secret of rejoicing in the Lord, for he understands that God will not let the darkness triumph over him. Yes, I know that others may not share my same belief and faith in the Christian world view- but I believe that it is the only world way, that has anything to say about suffering. And it is the only world view that confronts suffering head on. Some say that faith in God is a “crutch” per- say, and yet most of us, that have been put the ringer of life, understand what it’s like to walk with a limp.  And so yes, Jesus comes along side us in our suffering and gives us himself to trust and lean on.

After all, he was plunged into the deepest sea of darkness for us, to show us his mad love for us and that we are not alone in suffering. He knows our suffering, temptations and weakness very deeply. The blessing of life then, as I said in the beginning, is a bundle of minutes and precious moments, passing us by whether we like it or not, believe it or not. As such, it is up to us to embrace the moments, darkness in all. We all have a choice in how we handle and view the suffering.

I say embrace it, head on, knowing that God is the great shepherd. Who can lead you beside still waters, regardless of where you have been, what you have done or have scared you may be about the future.

You are loved, it is never too late to accept the hand with the most amazing love and grace.

Caught in the Storm

What Frustrates Me About CrossFit- And Why Winning Isn’t Everything.

No, I’m not here to say that I’ve changed my mind about Crossfit. I don’t think it’s dangerous, nor do I believe that it’s a cult or a fad. I believe that Crossfit is changing the very landscape as we speak.  As a person with cerebral palsy, and as one who has gone through several years with traditional physical therapy, nothing has made me strong or as mobile as the methodology of CrossFit.

As an adaptive Crossfit athlete, I have been doing this sport for almost over 3-4 years and competed in four different tournaments. All of which have been able-bodied events, I never thought that I would be involved in a sport like this.

I’ll never forget the feeling of walking into Crossfit Omaha with my dad and being the only person with cerebral palsy there. Honestly, that’s how it’s always been that way, so I wasn’t expecting anything else.

I’m not sure what other people were thinking when they saw me walk in there, maybe there was some doubt. Or maybe it was the doubt that was deep in my mind.  From that point on, I some so many other adaptive athletes rising as well, which is awesome. I would watch countless videos on youtube both of other adaptive athletes and abled bodied people.

What frustrates me then, is the illusions that these videos give off. Most of them suggest that people that do Crossfit are automatically brought into a family type setting where people cheer you on as though you are some hero. Sounds awesome right? But I very rarely experience this illusion of grandeur that these videos produce.

In fact, the support that  I do have comes from a  small group of people. I know what you’re thinking “well, at least you have people supporting right?”

Yes, you’re right, I am very thankful. My frustration and struggle then, is two-fold:

1) As hard as I work to get better, I still feel as though I’m “The  Lone Crossfitter” the guy who has to adapt everything, who doesn’t have full overhead movement at doesn’t move as fast or explosive as others. That I’ll never be apart of the winning team, or even take the podium as an individual.

2) I think this is where myself and others are going so wrong. In that, we have becoming so focused on winning. Certainly, it’s not wrong to want to win; I’ve never gone to a competition of any kind and not want to win. The problem is, then, that when you become some focused on winning that one can lose sight of what Crossfit is about altogether. And that is changing people’s lives!

It can be so deadly to be so focused on winning; your joy can be stripped from you so quickly. Honestly, I want to taste what it’s like to be on the winning team. But as much as much as I’d like to experience that.  I must always remind myself that there is much joy is teaching an adaptive athlete how to get up off the ground or teaching them to take steps without much aid slowly walk on their own. Or watching someone gain more mobility all together, there’s more of a victory in that than anything else.

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