Month: February 2022

Depression and The Power of Words

There are many forms of suffering in the world, but one of the world’s most silent of killers is depression. Depression at times can be unnoticeable, either because we as people don’t know what to look for or the person that is suffering becomes so good at hiding it, they seem fine altogether. Depression can often feel like a sinking feeling or wearing a weighted vest that only brings you deeper below the surface.

Depression while giving a person a sinking feeling, can also be very hard to talk about. One, because it can be hard to find a person that will listen to you, two, people feel as though they constantly must fix things, so often quick platitudes are given and 3) a hyper form of positive thinking is prescribed: “Just think positive and you’ll feel better!” Or faith-based crowds will say to pray away the pain.

Now, how we think or rather how we feed our minds does matter, and I’ll get to that in a bit. But first I’d like to speak to the quiet agony that depression can have on a person. Depression can be an unseen battle in the mind, you might not ever see it, but someone close to you can truly be getting their asses kicked mentally.

Largely what this can look like, is feeling as though no one cares about you, or that you’re a no good, untalented fairly that will never amount to anything. Much worse believing the lie that this world would be better off with you. Truthfully, this is a battle that I wouldn’t want anyone to live.

I myself have lived with this battle for 37 years, my depression is not bad year-round, though it totally seems that way. All the thoughts mentioned above are things that I’ve grappled with you. Therefore, I truly believe that depression is a spiritual war, because even if one does not believe in God or a higher power, when you go to therapy, you are primarily going there to combat the lies inside your mind.

Essentially as your counselor uses cognitive behavior therapy, their aim is to change how you think about yourself, and the rest of your future. In that the words that they say to you, have the power to change your thinking. This is why words are so powerful. Knowing this truth, changes how we speak to others and ourselves. Be mindful of how you speak to people on a daily, we humans are quite imperfect at times, but that should be a motivation to be mindful with our speech. I truly am convinced that we should spend more time building others up, encouraging, inspiring and serving others. As opposed to letting our mouths run wild and careless. Even apologizing for things, we didn’t mean or didn’t say exactly as we should.

Lastly, learn to counteract the lies and statements that pop into your mind ever so randomly. If your mind tells you that you’ll never amount to anything, remind your brain of the things you have accomplished. As with ever lie in the mind, learn to take hold of it and replace it with truth.

This might not seem like it works in the moment, or even every single time. But the more you reinforce your mind, the easier it is to fight. And on the days that really are difficult, know that they storm will eventually lift.

Leading With Our Words

What I’m about to share with you, should go without saying but I’ll the more that I survey society, the more that this simple truth comes back to mind. Simply put, there is profound power in our words.

Our words can become a sense of life and death, not only for ourselves but for those around us. The power of our words extend to every facet of our lives, in our work places, in our ability to coach and lead others and most certainly in our home lives.

In my estimation we as a people are so flippant with what we allow to spill from our lips, you may respond by saying that, it’s not your responsibility for how some one else chooses to respond. While that is correct, it is still on you to learn to not only control what you say, but to also think before you speak.

Once again, we are all leaders in one way or another, and we have the ability to write with our words on the soul of another with what we say. We have the ability to encourage, build up and inspire. Or we have the ability to wound others with what we say, the time we have with people in our lives is so small. So do you want to be known for the amount of trash that comes from your mouth? Or do you want to be one who provides life and healing?

I’m not saying that fun and joking cannot be had, be there is still a vast difference in making someone laugh and making others feel even worse with crude humor. You can really know what battle someone is facing on the inside, so that is all the more reason to be mindful of what comes out of your mouth. Our words, in a sense can be that of a small spark, a spark that can start an entire fire. This fire can be one that ignites the human soul to fly, or it can be a very of destruction. These are the only real options that we have when it comes to our words. So may we become more cognoscente of every word, every thought that comes to mind. Is it useful? Will what I say actually build others up or have the potential to rip someone apart? If you want to lead others well, it starts by learning how to reign in our mouth. Even the things we say to ourselves, because also what we say to ourselves creates a multi-level narrative that plays out inside of us. For just one example, if we tell ourselves that we are worthless and no good, what do you think is going to happen?
Unless we take control of that narrative, it will spill over onto every aspect of our lives. This, if left un-resolved will keep us stuck and we will be unable to move any further into our God given callings. So now, the mission becomes for you to heal. And though this journey and path may be difficult, if you do not choose to embark on it, you will never know the beauty of what is on the other side of the pain. Only when you choose to let go of the pain, and let forgiveness be your greatest weapon, can you actually become free. Then, and only then can you start to help and lead others. Our words are in a sense a legacy, so choose them wisely, even the ones we say to ourselves.